When one member of a family is hurting, the whole family suffers. The reverse is equally true: When the family system is out of balance, the dysfunction often gets expressed in what appears to be the problem of one individual who is labelled the “reason” you are seeking family therapy. Begin the healing process today.
The health and well being of each family member is reciprocal. For the family to thrive, each member of the family needs to heal as an individual and in relationship to the others. Every voice needs adequate space to give expression to their emotions, to be heard, understood and held in compassion. Without healthy, open communication this can seem like a distant fantasy.
Exploring multiple perspectives and restoring balance is crucial when the problem is expressed in the dynamic relationship between the whole and the parts. As a licensed marriage and family therapist, my role is to teach you the skills to communicate effectively, gain insight into the root of the problem, act with compassion for yourself and your loved ones, and find strategies to move forward in a different way by identifying and breaking long standing patterns of behavior that have caused disruption in your family.
Quiet tension in the marriage, a self-harming teen. Inherited trauma. Perceived and real abandonment. Hidden bottles, affairs, lies that feed on more lies. Secrets so dark, shame would bury them except the issues keep surfacing in unanticipated ways: trouble showing up for work or school, losing a job, failing a class, eating disorders, insomnia, nightmares, threats of suicide. Determining where the problem originated may feel nearly impossible. At a certain point, what matters is that the problems are acknowledged, the stifled feelings given expression, what has been neglected is attended to, responsibility is taken, and what has broken finds repair.
If your family is by birth or by choice, if you are new parents or the adult children of aging parents, if you are married or separated or divorced or partnered, the relationship dynamics of a complex, living and changing system have the power to nurture or destroy. Nothing quite gets to the core of human existence as the emotions stirred by our intimate relations, our mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, husbands, wives, girlfriends, boyfriends, and partners. We distinguish ourselves and grow as individuals in relationship to others. By healing our relationships, we too become whole.
I am a licensed therapist in Marin County. My office is in Tiburon, CA with easy proximity to Mill Valley and Sausalito. I see clients for therapy in person and online anywhere in California.
Portrait by Danny Dong
Artwork by Rachel Hulin
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